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Melancholic Mediocrity :v_bi:Disclaimer: Fuck it. I’m never going to get this essay to a point where I’m satisfied with it, so I’m going to post it in parts like a serial because I don’t have the spoons to set up a proper blog. I’m sick with what is probably covid (again [yay retail life]) and I’m just so goddamned tired.The following will delve into matters quite dark and gloomy such as mortality and severe depression; but it also will allude to positive developments born from this same gloom and doom.I hesitate to share this because it describes some very personal feelings and experiences, but my hope is that by doing so, it will resonate with and provide comfort to someone else out there on this gigantic blue marble.I began drafting this prior to the 2024 U.S. Presidential election from a place of darkness edged with optimism; however, since that time it’s become difficult to return to my former writing stride in the face of.. well, the results of said election, becoming functionally homeless, and so forth.I had intended for this to be one of my most polished writings – a triumphant manifesto of sorts; regrettably, like most aspects of my life, present circumstances have forced me to accelerate preparation and release of this essay prior to what I would consider an acceptable result.<a href="https://beige.party/tags/MentalIllness" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#MentalIllness</a> <a href="https://beige.party/tags/ideation" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#ideation</a> <a href="https://beige.party/tags/despair" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#despair</a> <a href="https://beige.party/tags/profanity" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#profanity</a>

The girl from Iparenzo<a href="https://mastodon.bida.im/tags/DESPAIR" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#DESPAIR</a>

Court Cantrell will not complyWhen I walked into the kitchen this morning, spouse said, "I saved the most expensive Valentine's present for this morning." And he handed me an egg. We laughed hard, but it was the morbid laughter of dark times, and though I know that "all we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us," but I really wish none of this were happening. <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/laughter" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#laughter</a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/tears" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#tears</a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/joy" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#joy</a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/despair" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#despair</a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/dialectic" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#dialectic</a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/dichotomy" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#dichotomy</a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/CurrentEvents" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#CurrentEvents</a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/eggs" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#eggs</a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/FuckingEggs" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FuckingEggs</a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/HowDidItComeToThis" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#HowDidItComeToThis</a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/NeverGiveUp" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#NeverGiveUp</a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/RESIST" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#RESIST</a>

David AugustI wrote what I felt this morning. Please read it here: <a href="https://davaug.medium.com/future-tense-14915d0da0b1" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" translate="no" target="_blank">https://davaug.medium.com/future-tense-14915d0da0b1</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/AmWriting" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#AmWriting</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/writing" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#writing</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/inspiration" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#inspiration</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/despair" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#despair</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/hope" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#hope</a>

Nonilex“His basement, his garage, his dorm room were the centers of the action where drugs were available, & he enjoyed showing off how he put baby chickens & mice in the blender to feed his hawks. It was often a <a href="https://masto.ai/tags/perverse" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#perverse</a> scene of <a href="https://masto.ai/tags/despair" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#despair</a> & <a href="https://masto.ai/tags/violence" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#violence</a>.”  She commended <a href="https://masto.ai/tags/RFKJr" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#RFKJr</a> for “pulling himself out of illness & disease” but lamented “siblings & cousins who Bobby ENCOURAGED down the path of <a href="https://masto.ai/tags/SubstanceAbuse" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#SubstanceAbuse</a> suffered <a href="https://masto.ai/tags/addiction" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#addiction</a>, <a href="https://masto.ai/tags/illness" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#illness</a>, & <a href="https://masto.ai/tags/death" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#death</a>…<a href="https://masto.ai/tags/USpol" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#USpol</a> <a href="https://masto.ai/tags/PublicHealth" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#PublicHealth</a> <a href="https://masto.ai/tags/NationalSecurity" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#NationalSecurity</a> <a href="https://masto.ai/tags/Trump" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#Trump</a>

James Fine Art (.art)Condemned. G. Charcoal on paper. A condemned man , semi collapsed, surrounded by dark figures holding a bright knife, lit by candlelight.[ Prints : <a href="https://james-mccormack.pixels.com/featured/condemned-james-mccormack.html?utm_source=mastodon&utm_medium=social" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" translate="no" target="_blank">https://james-mccormack.pixels.com/featured/condemned-james-mccormack.html?utm_source=mastodon&utm_medium=social</a> ]<a href="https://mastodon.art/tags/condemned" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#condemned</a> <a href="https://mastodon.art/tags/figures" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#figures</a> <a href="https://mastodon.art/tags/darkness" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#darkness</a> <a href="https://mastodon.art/tags/sombre" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#sombre</a> <a href="https://mastodon.art/tags/BuyIntoArt" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#BuyIntoArt</a> <a href="https://mastodon.art/tags/knife" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#knife</a> <a href="https://mastodon.art/tags/blade" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#blade</a> <a href="https://mastodon.art/tags/sombre" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#sombre</a> <a href="https://mastodon.art/tags/candle" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#candle</a> <a href="https://mastodon.art/tags/despair" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#despair</a> <a href="https://mastodon.art/tags/MastoArt" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#MastoArt</a> <a href="https://mastodon.art/tags/MastoDaoine" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#MastoDaoine</a> <a href="https://mastodon.art/tags/FediGiftShop" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#FediGiftShop</a>

acmCurrent mood:<a href="https://jawns.club/tags/CatsOfMastodon" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#CatsOfMastodon</a> <a href="https://jawns.club/tags/despair" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#despair</a>

David August<a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/despair" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#despair</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/disappointment" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#disappointment</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/autocracy" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#autocracy</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/dictatorship" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#dictatorship</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/dictator" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#dictator</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/fascism" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#fascism</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/despotism" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#despotism</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/despot" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#despot</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/ComplyInAdvance" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#ComplyInAdvance</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/loss" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#loss</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/inspiration" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#inspiration</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/inspirational" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#inspirational</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/inspiring" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#inspiring</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/instinct" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#instinct</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/DonaldTrump" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#DonaldTrump</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/trump" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#trump</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/trumpism" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#trumpism</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/political" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#political</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/politics" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#politics</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/USpolitics" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#USpolitics</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/AmericanPolitics" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#AmericanPolitics</a> <a href="https://mastodon.online/tags/USpol" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#USpol</a>

K.N. Brindle (they/them)Where do we go from here?This isn't a message of <a href="https://wandering.shop/tags/hope" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#hope</a>. I'm all out of hope for this place. It isn't a message of anger and a call for <a href="https://wandering.shop/tags/justice" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#justice</a>. These events show that there is no justice to be had. This isn't even a cry of <a href="https://wandering.shop/tags/despair" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#despair</a> for the death of my country, for if this <a href="https://wandering.shop/tags/vote" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#vote</a> has shown anything it's that there's nothing left here for the likes of me.They want me to be goneThis is a message of resignation1/4

Nonilex<a href="https://masto.ai/tags/KamalaHarris" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#KamalaHarris</a> also said that Americans should not <a href="https://masto.ai/tags/despair" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#despair</a>. Everyone in a <a href="https://masto.ai/tags/democracy" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#democracy</a> has the ability to make a decision about the future through their votes. “Let’s not feel powerless,” she said. “That’s not in our nature.”<a href="https://masto.ai/tags/Vote" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#Vote</a> <a href="https://masto.ai/tags/HarrisWalz2024" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">#HarrisWalz2024</a>

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